Where do I start with this one? That statement has actually been said to me numerous times in my adulthood. I can't tell you how many times in my adolescent & adult life I've been reminded of my size nearly every day, multiple times a day. I'm expected to not say anything in return & just laugh it off because being skinny isn't an insult right? Why would my feelings get hurt it's not like they're calling me fat.

I get it, in white mainstream America you're told skinny is the way to be. I'm an 80s baby/90s kid so bulimia & anorexia were big things when I was growing up. If you wanted to model, act, sing, dance, etc. the industry wanted you to be as skinny as possible. Since "Hollywood" made that their standard, being thin was the way to be; because of that if someone makes a remark about a skinny person's weight you're expected to just smile & take it as a compliment. 

I get everything from "why do you work out, if you get any smaller you're going to blow away" to "no, you go ahead and take the last doughnut you need it more than me", "you don't eat that's why you look like that" and yes "you're so skinny if I hug you, you'll probably break in half". Why is that okay to say to someone & everyone around will laugh & agree? If I were to say the opposite of that to a bigger person everyone would look my way in disgust & shock. 

I've even had one of my OBGYN's tell me during one of my pregnancies that is was "ok to eat because the baby needs it". Who in their right mind that actually planned their baby's conception would not do everything in their power to make sure they are doing everything they're supposed to ensure they have a healthy baby? The fact that this woman had seen my weight prior to pregnancy and had my sister and cousin (both are extremely thin too) also as patients just made the statement even more baffling.  

What I need for people to realize is being thin is okay in the white community, not the black one. Typically wanting to be extremely thin tends to be a white and/or older woman thing. Growing up for a good portion of my childhood in the south being thin in the black community is not something that's aspired for. In the south being "thick" is the norm so if you are really thin you stick out. With that being said, I'm well aware of my size and don't have body dysmorphia. I know I'm skinny. You have some people that are naturally bigger and some people that are naturally thinner (if you remember anything from biology this should be an easy concept to understand). I've been this way my entire life due to genetics.  I don't want to be thinner or think I need to be thinner so stop telling me I need to eat. I do eat & probably more than you.

Just because a person works out that doesn't mean they are doing so to lose weight. Your average person that works out regularly does so because they want to live a healthy lifestyle not because they want to drop a few pounds. Also, being skinny does not equate to being healthy. I know plenty of skinny people who have just as many health issues as overweight people. 

Please remember I am an adult, a real grown a- person so if I respond back to you with a smart remark don't be surprised. I didn't ask you for your opinion on my weight nor did I ask you for ways to "fix it". As the old saying goes, if you don't have nothing nice to say don't say nothing at all.  

 

 

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